I don't know what is going on with me these days, but it seems like me having a good day is next to impossible. I spent Monday mostly talking to Carbon and dealing with assholes at Wal Mart. I hate the way it always feels like the customers are the enemy these days. I just wish people could be honest and thoughtful, but it seems like every idiot on Earth has or will have a kid, actually they tend to have three or more so they can't handle them. Not that all people with tons of kids can't handle them, it's just the ones who come into Wal Mart and leave a giant mess for me to clean up and who can't read that I don't like.
Anyway, today didn't get any better. I went to that damn specialist, gave them my license (which is damn odd, what doctor needs a copy of that? I didn't even drive there!) and my insurance card. I filled out all the damn forms and got there thirty minutes early so I could do so. Then, at exactly two o'clock, and I swear they timed this, the woman comes and tells me they don't take my insurance and have never heard of it. Seriously, who hasn't heard of Foxwoods (except those of you who don't live in New England)? God, I've heard that "Wonder of it All" song sung at school so many times I'm going to find that smug looking guy who sings it and smash his guitar. I got damn pissed and started crying and yelled at her that she didn't know what it was like.
She told me I could pay for my appointment out of pocket and I said no (duh, it's probably like two hundred dollars and they guy is just going to feel me up, I could get that at school for free!), then she said the usual "we care for women with money" bullshit of, there are other patients here. I should've told her that these women have breasts that are going down to their fucking knees, because they were all old ladies with their husbands, my Grandma fit in better there than I did. God, am I the only girl on the whole Earth who goes to all these shit doctors who specailize in women's health? Seriously, I probably should get an award for being the first fiveteen year old in RI to go to the gynecologist's office (I went there for the first time when I was fifteen, but you all know I'm too antisocial to have sex). I just ran out of there and shouted "Keep you nine hundred dollars!", what I meant to say was, "You, like all the other fucking doctors in the US, which is turning into one giant shithole, just want money and don't care about helping people who need help." Seriously, how many women in their sixties and seventies have breast problems besides cancer and mammograms? They can't use their breasts because they're too old to have kids, so they don't deal with nursing and stuff. I honestly expected at least one woman in her thirties there.
I'm sorry I probably offened anyone reading this. We then went to a resturant that was closed and my car nearly got cut in half by three different GM cars. I really can't afford to have that happen, because if any of them had hit me, it would've totaled my car, which is worth about six hundred dollars, which is not enough to buy another car, not even an AMC Pacer, like I want to buy. The picture of Johnny Damon in his Yankees uniform bugs me, I honestly would've booed him if I was there last night, just because of the uniform. Also, he sounded so treacly when he talked about why he left, saying he felt like that Yankees wanted and needed him. I'm sorry, but we're talking about baseball not about your wife or kids, it just sounds so sappy to me.
Could someone please tell Adult Swim to stop showing the same Family Guy episode over and over again? I think I can act out all the older ones with sock puppets. If anyone wants to see that let me know, I'll charge five dollars a head like they do at school. I'm really tired and I needed to let all of my anger out, I basically let the cat out of the bag as far as my problem, I'm sorry it's so gross and embarassing (at least it is for me, which means it is for you to read). I'm just letting my thoughts out and I don't think it will really offened anyone because I didn't say anything negative about anyone except me and the people at the doctor's office, oh, and anyone who thinks this country is going in the right direction, I'd like to meet those people. I'm just irritated right now and everything around me seems fucked up and like it's getting worse, too. Everyday I feel like I'm sinking deeper into some kind of hole and soon I'll be stuck in it for the rest of my life. Anyway, I'll probably lock this entry, and if you want to read it I'll let you. If you are reading it, you wanted to. Thanks for reading it, I guess.
*Racecar*
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