Is it just me or is it impossible to save with car insurance if you're my age? I don't honestly think if I switched to some other company that I would be able to save money because I'm young and apparently can't drive. It seems like no one of any age can drive properly anymore.
I went to see my therapist today and that sucked. I told her about the whole thing last Monday and she said the same thing that asshole said. My Dad thinks I need to be on vitamins and I think I need to learn ways of coping with stress. I just wish someone would listen to me for once. I don't mind my Dad's idea because I don't think Flintstones chewables (great for flushing down toilets, btw) will make me tired and that I'll practically become depenedent on them. I don't have a problem with other people taking pills, but those things are needed. Carbon has ADHD, though I've heard that can be controlled without medication, I'm not sure if that's true or not. I remember one of my friends had trichotillamania and had to take meds so she wouldn't pull all her hair out, which makes sense to me because that's an impulse type thing. I just don't like that idea and I would like to only use that as a last resort. Oh, and did I mention for what could be the millionth time that I can't take pills and don't like pills or doctors, or the health care system in this country?!?! Did I mention that it pisses me off that there are people who are making money while forcing people to choose between meds and food? I just don't think it's right that health care goes up so much faster than everything else, that's not inflation, it's assholes making a bigger profit than they need to and it seems like the government is too busy counting their money to care.
I am just frustrated with everything right now. I want this semester to end so I can get some damn rest and figure some things out for myself. I really need to know what I am doing. I so badly want to make new friends and get a boyfriend but I just don't feel mentally ready and I want to be mentally ready right fucking now. It just sucks to be nineteen and not have a best friend for more than a few years and to have guys who have asses for faces like me and other guys who are sweet run away from me. It just irritates me and I know that me being irritated makes me worse. I'm sure people reading this get pissed when I complain about my life and feel like I have nothing to complain about.
Today wasn't a very good day at school. I'm having a hard time keeping up with all my school work, though I think I really worked on a song for Jazz Ensemble today and I actually think that I will do good if I practice the way I did tonight, which I should be able to do. I feel like all my jazz classes are giving me trouble and I hate the way people look at me when I'm lugging my amp and guitar, or even just my guitar. I also hate the look I get when I tell people I'm a music major. Try telling someone who doesn't know you that you're a music major and see what kind of look you get.
I'm getting tired right now, so I'm going to head to bed right now. I have a couple of songs to add to squareone that I will add probably tomorrow or Thursday. I've been losing sleep over the weekend and I haven't even been playing Neopets, even though I want to, I have been so tired and so much work is being thrown at me because it's almost the end of the semester, I think finals are in three weeks. Just watch my writing become compeletely incoherent. Good night.
*Racecar*
<< Tuesday, Nov. 29, 2005@10:08 p.m.>>