Hello, everyone! I didn't get to do much today. I worked on my Web Project and I think I'm going to try and work on it one day a week. It's not due until November 17th and I already read the whole website and wrote a paragraph, I think I'm going to do five, because it's the way we were taught to do an essay in school. I have to analyze the website. I don't think my paragraph today was very good for some reason I have a hard time writing paragraphs and sentences about things for projects, but I was like that in high school, too. It's probably not bad, but I just don't think it's very focused.
My Grandma is still sick, she's been sick for three days now. She's going to call the doctor tomorrow. I think it might have something to do with her celiac sprue. She's been eating a bunch of stuff she's not supposed to be eating, so it probably has messed up her intestines. I hope she'll be okay, I think they might have to put her in the hospital for a few days but probably nothing really big.
I called Carbon today but I didn't get to talk to her for very long. She told me she wants to be a graphic designer now, instead of a chef. I always thought she was a good cook though, and I kind of think she should still do that. Yet, she is good at drawing and it's nice to know I'm not the only one who thinks about changing my mind when it comes to what I want to do. I think it's funny that she wants to be in graphic design because she hates Apples, yet if you've ever been to an art lab at almost any school (even Welfare High), they usually have a few Macs. CCRI has an entire lab not too far from my Italian classroom. Carbon also told me she wasn't doing well in school, which suprised me because she said she really wanted to try hard to do good in college so she could go to a good school.
I'm not really sure how I'm doing in school. Carbon wants to go to RISD now, and they are one of the best art schools around, I think one of the best in the country. I want to go to UMASS Amherst, or possibly Berklee, but I don't think I could get in there. I'm kind of being forced to stay at CCRI for next year, too. I honestly don't feel like I'm going to college, just like it's high school again. I'm bringing my guitar with me tomorrow to show my therapist my playing abilities, but it's going to be a real pain to have to lug it up six flights of stairs and I don't know where I will put it in class.
I also noticed how I've never had a best friend for very long, I don't even have one now and it kind of makes me mad at myself. I want to try and learn to be more social. I want to be different and do somethings that I never thought I would do. I'm going to try and dye my hair back to it's original color (the dark brown of my roots), even though I don't like it, because I think I'm doing irreparable damage to my hair. I wish I could have it cut short but I don't think I would look good like that, mostly because my cheekbones are invisible. I guess I'm just out of stuff to say. I hate the way that my life has been following a pattern of having friends and then I end up alone like I am now. I'm still confused about whether to consider Carbon a friend or not. I guess the therapist was right and that she's just one of those friends you only hang out with once in a while.
I think it's weird how I've changed since I was younger though. I watched "Clueless" today which was one of my favorite movies growing up though I really think the ending is creepy and stupid. I remeber when I was little wanting to be rich like that and thinking that was what being a teenager would be like. Now, I don't really want to be rich and I don't really like shopping. I'm kind of glad that I didn't end up like that. I just find that weird, even though it was probably boring for everyone out there to read. I'll write more later. Bye!
*Racecar*
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