Seventeen days this time? That's no good. I was going to write the other night when I couldn't sleep, and I should've. I just wish it could be like it used to and I could write to music. Lately I've been forced to write to silence and then my mind wanders. I swear, my mind gets super active as I go to bed and I think all kind of things. I usually have to read something funny or interesting to get my mind away from all my troubles. It's kind of sad.
This week was vacation and it was okay. I hung out late Sunday night with Nad, we watched Anime Hell and Air Gear (I was surprised that he'd seen it, I was just finishing it) and talked about stuff. We also went to Taco Bell and he was playing around with all the buttons in my new Mini Cooper named Chris.
Monday I went to see Green Day, which was fun, they played for 3 hours, but I left after 2. The crowd was getting really rowdy and drunk. Not to mention it was similar to the last time I saw them in that they weren't getting through many songs because they were doing other things. Like inviting audience members on stage (four times), shooting water at the audience (twice) and shooting t-shirts at the audience, not to mention all the chatter that they had in between songs. It got to me after a while and this drunk guy kept bothering me. I was alone, which made me more a target, I guess. After the fourth time of slamming into me, I got angry and sat further down on the lawn. But it really bothered me and I started crying. He was bothering the people next to me, too, but it was a girl and her boyfriend, so he quickly realized his mistake and left them alone. It made me wish that I wasn't alone, that there had been someone there with me to watch over me a bit, or at least to talk to on the long ride there and back. This feeling kind of permeated through the week, as I saw two people from my past, who I think realized how lonely I am.
Mrs. Black and I no longer talk, and she is back in NY. I'm trying to get my stuff back, but it's taking forever. She blocked me from her Facebook, so I don't know how she is doing, though I'm not sure I care. I feel like in every fight we had, she always wins and I always lose. I'm kind of tired of being around people like her, who have things handed to them. She doesn't work or go to school, yet she has tons of friends around her. I always work super hard only to find myself alone 24/7. It just doesn't seem right to me, the way I would bust my butt for some people only to have it thrown in my face.
Anyways, this kind of led to me talking to a boy on FB, who is a friend. I was wining about the usual stuff when I told him about Fakir and how I planned to ask him out in September when I see him again. He asked why I didn't just call him up and ask him. So I told him that my smartphone had put his number in my phone because we're friends on FB, but that he hadn't given me his number, so I couldn't call him. This guy told me to ask Fakir for his number, so the next night I sent Fakir a message telling him I had a question to ask him, and that I would need to talk to him about it on the phone.
He wrote back to me later on Wednesday and gave me his number. It's his real number, too, because it matches the one already on my phone. I called on Thursday, but he hasn't called me back. His voice was on his machine though, which was kind of nice to hear. I hate it, because I sounded all nervous on the message I left him, telling him the time and to call me back whenever. He hasn't called, so I'm thinking of calling him again tomorrow when I get out of work and actually asking him a question. The problem is, I don't know what to ask him.
Anyway, I have to go to work to get my check and my schedule because I'm supposed to work tomorrow, but I don't know when. I'll write another entry soon, I promise. I kind of want to write one about Fakir, so you'll have to indulge me (or not read it, I hate it when I write a lot about boys, I feel like some kind of boy crazy idiot when I do). Bye. -*Duck*
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