Monday was a tough day and it has honestly made me wonder what I am going to do with school. I have to talk to my Dad about it tomorrow because things are going to get more hellish in my life until after Thanksgiving with work getting busy and finals coming up. I have no idea what to do because I don't think this whole jazz thing will pan out. I'm just having a hard time with school because I obviously took too many credits and can't handle all the work right now.
Today was kind of weird. I didn't have Harmony and Improv because the teacher never showed up. I was supposed to make up two tests that I missed on Monday but I went to the secretary's office and he was still in his meeting. It was nice to not have class but it was still weird and we're supposed to have a test over the weekend but I don't know what is on it. I hate how since it's nearly the end of the semester all of my teachers are rushing to get material out to us for finals. Why can't the crunch time be at the beginning of the school year, that way I can work on stuff when I'm not tired and stressed from everything else? I really hate school and it honestly makes me want to quit because I don't feel like I'm made for college.
I got a new coat tonight and two new sweaters. I nearly got one for free, but I told the woman she forgot to ring the other sweater up, mostly because I thought that there was a thing that would catch that the sweater hadn't been scanned and I didn't want to be caught shoplifting. The cashier seemed suprised that I told her, but why would I want to have a shoplifting record and that stuff has happened to me before. I always feel guilty, even though it's usually getting an extra pack of stickers at A.C. Moore because they stuck together and I didn't realize it. The coat I got is nice because it doesn't look bulky and has a hood that comes off. It even has lining that comes off as well, it looks to me like something a thirty year old would wear though. I'm kindn of concerned about my taste in clothes lately, it's like I don't give a shit anymore. I bought my shoes in September because they were comfortable, not because they looked good or anything, then I go buy this jacket because it seems practical and I like the color, even though it looks farty to me. It feels weird to not think like most girls my age, at least that's how I feel my thinking is.
I keep forgetting to buy that Neopets PS2 game. Is it any good? I don't know if anyone has seen the Boondocks, but I really like that show, though it kind of makes me feel ashamed of being white. Does anyone ever feel like that? I try not to discimminate against people and I don't think I ever have done that, but I still feel bad that my ancestors and relatives have. I don't understand why we can't just feel like equals instead of one group alienating the other. It honestly is stupid that racism is still an issue in this country, because it doesn't matter what you look like. I know I'm a visual person, but it seems like this whole country is too visual and selfish these days.
I'm going to go to bed now, even though I get to sleep in tomorrow, I do have some things I need to do. Good night.
*Racecar*
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