I'm sorry that I never update this thing anymore. I've been online, so it's not that. I just haven't felt like writing. I've been just reading about random, useless junk like I always do.
I haven't been up to much. Christmas kind of sucked, though I did get most of the gifts I wanted from my Dad.
I'm just depressed because I got fired from my job at Wal-Mart, have had no luck finding another one and ever since then, my car hasn't been running right. I just hate being home all the time, being alone, having nothing to do and no one to really do anything with. I haven't felt this depressed in a few years. I don't even really have anyone to hang out with.
I'm supposed to go back to school soon, to URI. I did get in the music department, though I have to take a class before I can take guitar lessons with the teacher for credit. I honestly didn't think I had gotten in because they took so long to get back to me. I'm supposed to get a schedule this week, but I'm not sure how that will work out because of my lack of a car.
My Dad is trying to fix it right now, but he sucks at that. I wish he would've just listened to me and had it taken somewhere. I think it's going to end up getting towed somewhere and I'm going to have to borrow his truck to go to URI. I'm just sick of this shit every week, it's frustrating.
I sent my FAFSA to URI so that I could get financial aid and maybe a job down there. I was also thinking of working in the retail area there, it would be nice to be able to walk from class to work. I hope that once I get back to school it will be easier for me to find a job and maybe get me motivated. This sitting around doing nothing makes me feel like I am going nowhere with my life.
I'm kind of tired, but it could just be boredom. I don't feel like doing anything anymore and it makes me sad. Life really seems like it sucks sometimes. The song "Bags of Bones" by Owen makes me think of Tristan. That was how I wanted to bond with him, not over real broken bones, but the metaphorical ones. I want to write to him, but I think he might be mad at me, and I kind of feel like a fool when it comes to him. I'm not even sure what to say to him. I do miss him.-Kate
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