I don't know what to do anymore.
One of my "friends" was telling me about all my problems and how I won't be able to find love because of them and how I'm the only person he knows who has gotten upset at work. It honestly made me feel like he was just ragging on me to be mean.
Then, I was talking to Lee and he was putting words in my mouth, accusing me of calling him stupid and saying that he didn't care about me, which I never fucking said.
I'm not talking to anyone online anymore, I'm sick of everyone getting mad at me and no one trying to help. It's all "you don't deserve this, you don't understand this". The only person that I talk to online who makes me feel better is Felisha, everyone else I talk to on IM just makes me feel worse. So does Tristan. AIM always crashes on my computer anyway, so I was using iChat, but that program is a bitch. Needless to say, I will no longer be reachable when I'm online.
I lost my job at Wal Mart yesterday over something that happened a month ago. My car broke down today and I am not sure what happened. 30 Rock got preempted because of the storm, and they didn't show it in it's entirety. Still, I would give my soul to Satan for a family like Liz's. I just don't see the point in my life anymore.
Everyone seems to hate me and there are just too many people who are putting me down and not listening to me. When people don't listen, it makes me feel like they don't care to take the time to actually try and understand what I'm saying.
I wish I could die and start anew as someone else without all these problems. I feel like I am not lovable with my problems, at least that's what people say. I'm starting to think it because it seems like so many people are mad at me and I just feel worthless. You don't know how much fucking hurt I've had to deal with this year. I just wish that I could start over. I'm so tired of this life.-Kate
<< Thursday, Dec. 13, 2007@11:41 p.m.>>