I don't know what the title is about, really. It's kind of part of a song that's caught in my head, but not really. I think I will post that song in squareone tomorrow, and there's one that I heard while working out that I'm also planning to post. I was hoping to work out tonight, but I'm just not in the mood for it right now, though I'll probably try to later on for at least thirty minutes, or else I feel guilty. I sat on my ass playing neopets most of the day, resting up for my big driving lesson that was tonight.
It went okay. I got on the highway and off it pretty good. I made it near the turn that goes into my uncle's plat, because I was supposed to go to his house. I go to make the turn, but I didn't slow down enough. Then, some asshole parks two cars on the side of the road, even though there was more than enough room in the driveway for both of them, which caused me to oversteer to avoid them. I ended up going over yet another curb, and into someone else's driveway, nearly landing into a Honda Civic. Then, as I tried to back out, some asshole was coming down the street and I couldn't move because I was nervous and he wouldn't move. He was staring at me, too, even though I kept shouting at him to quit. I was so pissed off, and embarassed, that by this point, I was crying. I told my Dad I didn't want to do this anymore, and I got out. The guy was STILL staring, and I flipped him off when my Dad went by him, though my Dad realized he couldn't move because of the two cars.
I hate plats. I hate driving in them, and I hate the people who live in them. They can't park in the fucking driveway, they HAVE to take the road. It's just stupid, and then there are kids playing in the middle of the street, and they expect you to avoid them at all costs, when they're in your path. If you did that on my road, even if it was to check your mail, someone would be pissed because you were there. Not only that, they might be stupid enough to run you down. I have to admit, I'm starting to hate driving and I really hope that I'm not becoming like my mother, she hated everything.
I think that the stress of the situation gave me a bad mood, as did having to go to the bathroom. We stopped at a Burger King, and I don't think I even wanted to leave the bathroom, I was crying so much. My eyes were red where they should've been white and they hurt like hell. I'm still a little shaken up from the whole thing. I know I'm probably making a big deal out of it. Yet, it always seems like people only notice you when you make mistakes, and never when you're doing something good. There are a few people out there like my Dad, Carbon and Puppy, who do recognize when I'm doing something good. But most people ignore it or just expect that of me. Then, when I do something wrong, those people are the very first in line to berate me, as if I was made to be perfect. I'm sure that those people know who they are.
I don't think I want to go to FiFi's party. I really don't want to see her. I was reading my old entries and even before what happened, things between us were always rocky. I just don't want to get nervous and uncomfortable around her. That happened to Carbon and her mom when this woman at the historical society meeting started bitching about Carbon's mom and Carbon's sister. She was just being rude and she didn't even know the whole story. Carbon nearly had a panic attack and her mom seemed pretty upset, though they both tried not to let the woman know it. I thought the woman was being an ass from the moment she came in, but I didn't say anything about it. After she said that, the whole meeting had a sense of tension to it, and I was so glad it was over.
Yesterday was pretty good, and tomorrow I plant to call Hydrogen, Dancer and Carbon. I want to do something with Hydrogen, but she might be busy. I want to ask Dancer's advice about the party and I also want to tell her the whole story, not just from now, but before taht, with the older entries from my other diary. I want to ask Carbon if she wants to do something and tell her about tonight's fiasco, if she wants to hear it. She's online now, but she won't talk, or it's not her and either her mother or her father doesn't recognize my screen name. I think my AIM might be screwed up, maybe not. Did you know fiasco is an Italian word? One of the very few things I learned in that class! Bye!
*Racecar*
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