I'm sorry I don't write often, I'm very tired. I didn't go to bed until one last night. I didn't get to play much guitar tonight because Katie and I made a dessert for Thanksgiving. I don't know if I'll get to practice tomorrow because all of my hard ass teachers decided to have class. I wish I could have the day off to sleep, the weekend is going to kill me, if you didn't already know that.
I applied at Berklee, but it feels like a long shot to me. They should get my whole application by the end of the month, hopefully.
He's writing stuff on his MySpace now. It's in French, but I've been translating it. It's about his experience in college, and it just makes me realize how much I have in common with him. He writes about how he hated it there, how girls didn't like him, how he slacked off. That's why I like him so much, because even though he is so far away, I just feel like he could understand me the way I understand him. I would really love to be loved by someone who actually understands me.
I don't know what to make of him though, I doubt he thinks of me. Sometimes I think he is just some distraction that my mind has chosen so I can keep going. Or maybe so that I don't worry I'm asexual (the meaning that one does have sexual feelings for anyone, not the method of reproducing on one's own) or so that I can be whoever I want to be without worrying what the guy I like will think, because he's too far away to know the truth.
The guys around my way have been assholes lately. They seem to hit on people around me, but never me. Except for this creepy kid today at Best Buy, but I don't think that he liked me, he was just trying to sell me tons of stuff. I really do want that Rolling Stone with Borat on the cover, though. I'll probably buy it tomorrow if I get the chance, or even on Thanksgiving, I think CVS is open. I'll probably get it tomorrow, I have to get Grandma a book for Christmas, and then I'll be all done with my Christmas shopping, though I might buy a book of poetry for myself. He really likes poetry, so I figure I should try reading some of it.
It just bums me out that guys don't really like me. Katie likes this guy who stopped by her house the other day, just to talk to her. He broke up with his girlfriend and I just think it's so cute that he stopped by her house just to talk to her. I kinda wish a guy would do that for me. I'm jealous of Katie, but I know deep down I should be happy for her. I have to go to bed now, my eyes have been hurting for the past two days, I'm sure my guitar doesn't like that I'm not playing it as much, though. Bye.
*Racecar*
<< Tuesday, Nov. 21, 2006@11:24 p.m.>>