Felt like using a boring, old fashioned title. Anyway, I added all the links I could think of. Wildflower is in my English class, her diary is old and anti-updated. Disney's and Chip-Chop's are semi-new. Mr. Sarcastic updated last night. He's in my History class, I used to have a crush on him, I still kind of do, but I doubt I would impress him in anyway.
Reading their diaries made me think of a ton of things. Like how differently people's written thoughts are from the way they come off. Mr. Sarcastic always seems like he doesn't care about his future or anything, and he seems to have a well sized ego. Yet, in his journal, he seems so different. It's kind of like being able to have x-ray vision and see what's inside someone's skeleton, but I doubt anyone from my school will ever find me.
I couldn't read Chip-Chop's, I didn't want to go back too far and read some awful comments about myself. I figure that we both don't like each other very much, and it's just best that we avoid each other. Even the guy I like now, (whose diary I have yet to find) probably has his own group of friends, and that doesn't include me, or anyone I'm friends with. People are just so exclusive like that, and it bothers me. I'm probably like that, too. I think I don't really have a chance with this boy, we come from two different worlds, and I don't think either world would happily merge with the other.
It kind of made me sad to read those diaries, too. Everyone seems to have a full life and future set ahead, but I see nothing in mine. I'm still missing all the people I knew only a year ago. It just seems like it really wasn't that long ago. I just wish that I could find a portal or a whole in the universe, that would take me back there and just let me stay. The way things are now just isn't the way I want them to be. It seems like life has spun of out my control for good.
The whole story with my permit is this: I get it on Wednesday afterschool (with a ton of luck). My Dad is teaching me to drive both his Ford Ranger that he bought last year, and the Jetta that he bought in November. Anyway, I'm not sure which one I'll end up driving. It seriously looks like the Jetta, because my Dad and I were talking about it last night. I told him that, it would be highly unlikely that he would get his 1981 Rabbit (which is now called a Golf, every car my Dad has had since I was a baby is either a Ford or a Volkswagen, though I'm not sure why) anyway, he gave it to his friend to fix a year ago, and he hasn't gotten it back. He's going to try to get it back next month, though.
Anyway, if he does get it back, the Rabbit still needs some repairs. I would also imagine it would have to pass inspection, and let's just say that most of the things on the car (tires,etc.) are at least five years old. It would take him a day to work on it, and probably another day to get it inspected, which is about two weeks in Dad time, since at least one of his days off is sadly devoted to toting me around. Anyway, he said that he would rather I drive the Jetta, because the Ranger is pretty big, and it's harder to drive. I just want to drive the Jetta because it's smaller, more comfortable, NOT a Pontiac Grand Am (half of Welfare High students drive one, or so it seems) and it's got a nice sound system. It's probably sad to say, but I know nothing about cars.
Anyway, I really should call Carbon and talk to her about tomorrow. We're supposed to go to the movies and the mall, and I want to know when, and if we still are, who's going, etc. I wanted to call "God" (Hydrogen, her name from Idol Worship Day) and ask her if she'd like to come, or if we could do something on Tuesday (Professional Development day for teachers, no school for us!). The rain around here is really pissing me off. I was supposed to go on a whale watch, but it got canceled. I have a song or two for squareone, watch out!
*Racecar*
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