That's the title I thought of this morning, since I was working on this project with these three girls from my English class. We're doing a magazine based on Seventeen using the things that happened in The Catcher in the Rye, which we just finished reading.
You should've seen it! I've never seen such Barbie-like lives in all my life! I know it's just surface stuff, but it all seemed so surreal. Perfectly straightened hair, handsome boyfriends (including Creative Writing Boy-one of my former crushes), moms who are home (and conscious!, my mom almost never was) and cars of their own. They even have permits! It just seemed so different from what I'm used to. They have someone to hang out with and something to do everyday. They actually have normal conversations with boys. They don't listen to loud rock music, but rather, incredibly bland and inoffensive country. They flat iron their hair, they hate to read, their online names have tons of numbers in them, and they don't have cable modems. They also don't have over a hundred cds and don't know where all the magazines are in a Wal-Mart.
I just don't know how they can live like that. They live in rooms without clutter, and they have brothers and sisters! It just seems so different from anything I've ever been a part of before. Even Hydrogen, the most normal and banal of all my friends isn't like that! It's like a entirely different world is right in my hometown. Yet, I could NEVER be a part of it. Even when I was with them, I rarely spoke. It's just so weird, the way that they do things so differently from me, they live the kind of life that Barbie would live (if she were real, I imagine).
Right now, I look like one of them. My hair is straight (it's usually quite unruly and curly), I'm wearing makeup (I almost never do) and I'm sitting up straight. You wouldn't be able to tell I wasn't them if I didn't have my cd player (Typo lives again! I don't know how I got him to live again, but I did! :) blasting out heavy rock.
Even though their life was fun, and it was fun to be a part of it, I know that I could never be happy that way. Not like I am now. I mean, this isn't the best life, but it's good enough for me. I feel like I'm probably being more true to myself than they are, but I am trying to straighten out my hair, since it does look better that way. I went out and bought a straightner, since I plan to wash my hair when I go offline.
I don't really have much else to say. Tuesday was a horrible day, but tomorrow will be better, I hope, though I'm nervous about my guitar lessons. Hopefully, I'll do well. Today was pretty good, but I have a ton of homework to do. I hope I'll be okay, I'm nervous about everything these days, yet I'm too lazy to do anything about it or anything in general. I think this is just going to be a tough time for me, but once I get through it, I'll be okay. I say that way too fucking much!
Something interesting happened with Perscocho yesterday morning. I was listening to Typo, who had all of the sudden started working, and he found me. One of his friends was with him, and Perscocho called me his bitch in front of his friend. His friend asked who I really was, and at this time, my cd player had stopped working for no reason (though Perscocho didn't seem to notice this). Perscocho said I was his bitch, and then the boy asked if I was his girlfriend, and he said yes! I find that so weird. He's never asked me out, or anything, and I have to say he's pretty dense to assume I couldn't hear him, because I'm not deaf, even when the headphones are on, which they usually are. That's pretty much it for now. There will be more tomorrow night. I'm going to eat some really hard food, maybe some ribs, before I lose the ability to. Bye!
Your insane friend in the sky,
*Grape*Cloud*
<< Wednesday, Nov. 13, 2002@3:23 p.m.>>