I was going to add an entry before but it seems like this site is always busy around ten thirty to midnight, I kind of always figured it would be earlier in the day, but it never seems to be. I did write in my Teen Open Diary, though I don't think anyone reads that. I really wanted to know what everyone's thoughts were on the last entry, so if people could tell me what they think in a note or guestbook, let me know.
My Grandma is delusional and thinks that they wanted me to come with them so I would get drunk and in trouble with my Dad. I don't know why she thinks I would have even had anything if I went with them. All I wanted was some milk and a salad, though they were too busy listening to Hydrogen's every word to listen to me. It gets on my nerves that everyone likes her more than me. I don't get why it's wrong to be shy, or why shy people always have to take a backseat to outgoing people. It's just like that whole skinny/fat thing, where people like to look at skinny people and date them, etc. Only because it's part of a person's peronsality it's not descrimination. I hate the fact that I was both fat and shy, though I can't seem to get rid of my shyness. I just don't get it, because there were a few times in school when I worked harder, I never did anything illegal, except jaywalking and I don't take a really long time to get ready or shop at the mall. I'm irritated still about the way that I always end up taking a backseat to everyone else these days. When I tell people that, I get the whole "you're selfish" thing.
My Dad thinks I did the right thing, though and I'm pretty sure he's right. I seem to do better without friends, but it depresses me. It's so funny, there's this parody of 1984 on Sealab 2021 and it's so funny, because no one seems to realize that Communisim is bad except Stormy and Quinn. I don't know why I find it funny, but I do, because they screw everything up on that show.
Anyway, I got two new pairs of jeans today and two shirts to go with them. I went down to a size ten in jeans, but I don't think I can fit into a seven because my hips are too big. I wish I could find a pair of jeans that would fit perfectly with my height so I wouldn't have to wear heels all the time. I got a new bag at The Gap, which is really nice denim and goes with my jeans, which I got at Express because they're the only ones who have long, short and regular leg lengths, except Old Navy and nothing from there seems to fit very well. It was funny, my Dad wanted to go in American Eagle Outfitters to check it out, which I think it is weird because it's a teenagers clothing store, so he couldn't fit into anything there. I kind of think their clothes look the same an Abercrombies, which I used to think was a gay men's store because of all the dark colored clothes, the guys coming out of there and the bags with the half naked guys on them. I feel bad for the guys who shop there, or maybe they have plain bags or bags with girls on them for the guys.
I didn't do much else today. I dropped off my audition stuff yesterday at CCRI and they said that they would call me once they did all the paperwork and give me a time for my audition sometime after Friday. I hope it's not too early in the morning, because the Norah Jones concert is on Tuesday night. Yes, I'm a weird dork. The audition is the next day. I really hope that I do good. I don't think I can play the songs fast enough, but I think I've already written about that. I also convinced the library lady to activate my id card even though I'm not eighteen yet, so my Dad is supposed to sign it so I can borrow books there. I gave it to the girl anyway, because I'm only about a month away from turning eighteen. It's pissing me off that I'm not considered an adult yet only because of a few months. I want my new license, too! My birthday is on a Sunday this year, which really sucks.
Anyway, that's it for now. I'll write more tomorrow. I have to get to bed because I'm going to the Paw Sox game tomorrow night. Good night!
*Racecar*
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